I recently read a book about this and have put more thought into this idea than I really think I should have.
If you were terminally ill would you tell people?
I have mixed feelings about this.
Would people treat you differently? I think they would. I think they'd censor what they said to me to avoid confrontation. I think they'd let me win all the time too.
Would you want a final party so everyone could say goodbye or just want people to have their own unique way to say goodbye.
Or would you say nothing. You'd avoid those teary moments thinking that the end is nearing. Those last goodbyes. People would just remember their last moments with you.
Would your surviving family and friends understand why you kept it to yourself or think it was selfish?
Hmm...I have no idea what I'd do. It was an interesting book - the main character chose not to tell anyone and instead tried a bunch of new things that he'd always wanted to but was too afraid to. In the end though, I think he regretted his own choice.
3 comments:
It'll be interesting to see what reactions you get posted about this thoughtful question.
I would tell people in stages. Like I wouldn't tell the kids right away. But I'd tell Darryl and our parents and siblings and good friends. I'd quit my job and spend all the time with the kids and we'd go and do fun fun stuff. But I'd want the chance to say goodbye to everyone and give everyone a chance to come to term with what was going to happen.
Jenn
I would tell. Here and there...then eventually everywhere. Heck, I can hardly keep a pregnancy to myself I know I couldnt' keep that inside otherwise I would be so miserable to live with!
A party sounds fantastic! A friends father died last year and he knew it was coming, so planned his "funeral"...a dance with a live band, bar, etc. After every set or so someone would give a speech...celebration of life kinda speech...I thought his was brilliant!!
I've taken a few end of life, palliative care courses and went through the hypothetical planning...it's emotional and certainly gets you thinking in a much bigger, broader way.
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